Thursday, November 17, 2011

Shouting into the Void

At work the other day, we got into a conversation about Twitter. The ladies there seemed to be of the opinion that it's a horrible monster of doom. And that's okay, because before I had a smarter-than-me phone, I thought it was a horrible monster of doom. I still sometimes forget to even look at it for days or even weeks at a time.

It's not a horrible monster of doom for me now, because I see the usefulness of having some place to go. Twitter, in my ever humble, non-expert, recently terrified opinion is a big room where you can go and strike up a conversation.

"Twitter is scary if you think of it a place where you have to be witty or smart or novel. Because then you're just shouting into the void, wondering if it'll echo. If you think of it as a party you can wander into, have a three minute conversation and then wander back out of, it's much less intimidating," I told them.

Blogging is like that too. I like blogging best when what I say starts a conversation. I don't like to shout into the void. It's an awful lot of words to shout, for one thing.

But, you know, conversations are hard. Because you have to, like, talk about stuff. And sometimes I just don't feel up to that. Sometimes I feel like I've talked about it all and I don't want to talk about it anymore. I wonder if I should just give up on this here bloggy thing and I stare at the blank screen and lament my lack of talkiness.

Sometimes I don't want to talk because I'm pissy or hurt or scared and talking is scary.

Sometimes I'm just really not in the mood to talk and so I don't. I close the big white screen down and go somewhere else. Or I shout into the void. About stupid stuff. Because it's easier than talking.

This is an apology, yo.

I'll talk more later. And better and I'll say things that matter. I'll tell you about the scary stuff and the sad stuff and the happy stuff and the funny stuff. Just not today, okay?

Today, I'm just whispering into the void.

2 comments:

Jenn-Jenn, the Mother Hen said...

Whatever you do and whenever you do, I'll be here to listen.

Joni said...

(For some reason, I missed this post when you first wrote it, so I'm just commenting now.) I love your blog because it feel EXACTLY like just wandering into a conversation. Sometimes it's deep, sometimes it's not, but it's always just chilling among friends. I LOVE that, and I would be very very sad if you stopped blogging. Please don't feel pressure to have to produce a certain amount of any particular type of blogs, or a certain quota per week! I don't always feel like talking, so I certainly understand when you don't either. {{HUGS}}