Hey, There Buttercups

I know, I know. I've been totally MIA, and then I show up here like nothing happened and ask for a favor. 'Cause that's what I'm doing. I'm totally showing up out of nowhere to ask for your help. Because (if you're still around and seeing this) you are my people. You're the people who have stuck with me through my divorce and my coming to terms with my mental health issues and my weird conversations with my kids. And you're the people I can count on.

So, before I get to the favor, some updates:

• I'm working on a new blog. I'm not ready to launch yet and I'll be back in a bit to give you guys a link, but ultimately, I miss blogging, but I'm not sure this is the place I belong anymore. I just wanted a fresh start, more than anything else. And so, I started a fresh place. Or at least, I'm working on it. Hopefully, I'll have something for you soon.
• The kids and I are good. The ex and I are getting along. The dog is happy, but crazy. In short, everything around here is fine. My new job is kicking my butt and I'm still calling it new 18 months in, but whatever. I'm good.
  
  And now, the favor...
• I wrote a book. At least I mostly wrote a book. I finished writing it, but I'm doing some pretty major overhauling in the first editing phase. But all the same, I wrote a book! It's about a vampire and witch and they are trying to rescue a kidnapped little girl. And there's drama and romance and death and blood and all kinds of craziness. There's also funny. I mean, I hope it's funny. There are references to The Wizard of Oz and Beatles songs. There's a deep look at what family and home actually mean and there's a sarcastic, brave, kickass, chubby girl protagonist. 

So, here's what I would like you to do. In another list, because I'm a fan of lists:

1. Read the first chapter. It'll give you a pretty good idea of what the book is going to be like. There's sarcasm and jokes and it gets down to business pretty quick. 
2. Hit the follow button, while you're there. If you do that, you'll know when I post new stuff, like maybe even another chapter...
3. Share it. There's buttons for Facebook and Twitter if either of them are your jam and there's a book trailer you could share around if that's your speed. 
4. Buy a copy. I mean, I'll still totally love you if you do numbers 1, 2 and 3, but crowdfunding a book requires... well, funding. The lowest level of support is just $10 and it'll get you an ebook version. If you want a hard copy, that'll be just a smidge more. But, remember, you're not just buying a book, you're buying me. And I'm cute. And, in case you're worried about tossing your money in a hole, if I don't get enough orders to publish, you're money will be refunded to you in full. 

So, that's it. Just four simple steps to helping me make my dreams (literally since I was 8 years old and figured out that people wrote those things I was obsessed with) come true. 

Yep, that's a pen name, a pseudonym, a
nom de plume.