I've been reading a lot of "Word of the Year" posts. (If you are unfamiliar with this concept, it's basically a replacement for the New Year's Resolution. You choose a word to be your guiding principle for the year ahead. Then, I'm assuming, you forget it before February and revert to your old ways of slobby, stingy, status quo-ness. Because that's what we always did with resolutions, right?)
I've been reading about how people are going to strive to GIVE more or ENJOY more or look UP. And I've been thinking about what I want out of this year. What I want is to GET IT TOGETHER but I'm not sure that's one word or that inspirational. And then it occurred to me.
What I need is to ask.
Here's the thing. I hate to ask. For anything. I will sit at the table miserable for twenty minutes instead of just asking someone to pass the pantsing butter. Imagine what happens when I need something big.
(It's been pointed out to me that perhaps I am sabataging myself by not asking for help and then berating myself when I fail. To that I say, "Um, who, me?")
It's a thing with me. I don't want to be weak. I don't want need help. Which is just plain ridiculous, because 1.) I love to help. Ask me for help. I almost never say no (something else I need to work on) and 2.) Everyone needs help, and 3.) C'mon. Look at me. Clearly I need help. I'm the girl in dress pants and white tennis shoes with mayonaise stains all the way down her outfit who can't remember if she brushed her hair this morning. Help-needing should be a foregone conclusion.
So, this year, I pledge to my self (an no one else, because February is coming fast) to ask for what I need. People may say no and they may think I am a useless hoser who can't take care of herself, but I guess that's part of it, isn't it: Finding out who you can ask.
What about you? What's your word of the year?