I was going to save this until the end of the week, but if last night was any indication, we'll have enough for a week's worth:
Me: So, do you all want to sing one more song before we go?
Children: (in unison and loudly) NO!
Me: Let me rephrase, We're gonna sing another song before we go!!! Yaaaayyyy!!!
Me: Where are we, right now?
Six Year Old Boy: The cemetery!
Me: Close! The santuary!
Me: Hitting, strangling, kicking and smothering are not good church manners and I'm shocked that I even have to tell you that.
Ten Year Old Boy: Yes, mam.
Me: What did Peter, do for a living? Taylor*?
Taylor: (shocked and unprepared) Bartholomew!
Me: What was Peter's job?
Me: Aaaanyone else?
Me: What happens to the stuff we throw away?
Eight year old girl: It gets recycled?
I just had to throw that one in because I think we are not quite teaching kids about ecology correctly.
Me: Did you have a good time at VBS tonight?
Brynna: No. It was boring.
Me: What did you like?
Brynna: Well, the craft was awesome, and the snack was yummy and the games were fun and the story was good.
Me: So basically, the only thing you didn't like was the music?
Brynna: Oh, yeah, the music was fun, too.
Me: So, um... That's all of it. What was boring?
Brynna: Being there.
What does that even mean!!!
*Name changed to protect the totally guilty of ignoring me when I was talking, yet still innocent by virtue of being a ten year old boy.
Think of me tonight, as you are doing whatever nice, calm, relaxing thing you are doing and I am once again putting my dignity on the line for a bunch of rugrats. I love 'em, though.