Thursday, July 14, 2011

I'm Sorry... What Day is It?

Oh my. It's time for another whining post. Get ready because this one is a doozie (doosey, doosie, doozy, seriously - I know it's a freakin' word).

So, you remember my car? The evil one that loves to not run? Yeah, it's running. After $2,000 for a new tranny (and not even the fun kind with too much makeup and Cher impersonations) and $120 for new brakes, it is currently putting rubber to road. We can't get too excited, because I'm sure it'll break any day now. But since it's running, my husband's car (the mini mobile) has decided it's not budging out of my front yard.

This has meant ride sharing. With my husband. The love of my life. Or something. Here's the thing - we don't do this well. There are some things that we kick butt at doing together. We can taco night like nobody's business. We are super-duper arguers. We have this one (just one) swing dance move that we can do in our sleep. We can watch Firefly all day without getting out of bed. But we cannot share a car.

For one thing, we're not morning people and we have to get up and be civil and get the kids ready together and get our stuff ready together and when we are done we can't scream and slam the door and stalk out to the car - because the other person will be there. Which sucks.

Also, I now have three - count them three - people trying to control my radio while I drive  - AND ONE OF THEM CAN REACH IT! I know. Has there ever been a bigger travesty?!? Someone should report this to the Geneva Convention. I'm sure they are very worried about my "driver picks the tunes, unless I am the passenger" rule.

Furthermore, Hubby works a funky schedule, so he has to go to work hours early and I have to hang around town hours late to get him. This is me sighing a big, ole, crazy sigh while I roll my eyes.

Also, my kid is a terrorist. Earlier this week, she was suspended from day camp for terroristic threatening - because she said she was going to kill anyone who liked pickles. And, okay, I had the talk with her and explained that we don't threaten to kill people and we really just don't joke about killing people and look, I swear this is a big deal. And I managed to do it without laughing. Because as much as I want my kid to be a hippy-dippy-tie-dyed-flower-child, I just cannot take a pickle-related death threat seriously. I just can't.

And I started The Hunger Games. God help me, I gave in and am reading a best seller and I cannot put it down.

So, I know that it's Thursday and this is the first time I've even cracked my blog open this week. I've also discovered online logic puzzles which is highly addictive and crazy.

Forgive me. I promise a Five Things tomorrow and then next week, back to blogging as usual. In the meantime, think of me, my terrorist child and my husband-for-now-but-we'll-see-how-long-this-lasts when you are having a peaceful morning routine. Think of us fondly.

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