Friday, January 28, 2011

Five Things on Friday - Weird Stuff I Keep in My Desk Edition

I covet that stapler, Milton.

I change jobs on Monday. It's not an exciting change. It's a little depressing, really, and I'm not going to dwell on it this weekend. However, I packed up the personal stuff in my desk to move to my new desk on Monday and I was thinking about office spaces. (Not the excellent movie, Office Space, although that pertains, but real office spaces. I've worked most of my life in some approximation of cubicle world and I have accumulated a few pieces of flair. You know the stuff that's supposed to show how individual you are that positively everyone has. It's just part of the life of a cubicle drone.

But, since I was packing and reminding myself of all my weird crap, I thought I'd share some of it with you. Therefore...

Five Pieces of Flair from Jessi's Desk

1. The Bat Signal - Years ago when I worked for a local chapter of a very well known national non-profit, we lunched a lot. At really cheap places. So, one day, at Bob Evans, I picked up a sucker on the way out. It had a Batman wrapper and a weird thick plastic stick. After I got to the car, I realized that the weird black plastic stick had a button that, when pressed, projected the Bat Signal. I ate the sucker, declaring it the coolest thing ever, and have saved the stick. Sometimes when I am feeling desperate, I illuminate the Bat Signal. It's sad, really.

2. The Blood Party - Last Halloween, I got a postcard invitation to a fundraiser for a charity. I didn't go, but I kept the postcard and tacked it to my wall. Why? Because it said,"Blood: The Party. You're so vein, you probably think this party's about you." I still chuckle every time I read it.

3. The Gravestone - Brynna got a tiny rubber gravestone in a gumball machine a few years ago. She was icked out, I was amused. It's graced my desktop ever since.

4. Play Doh - For when the kids visit me.

5.Newspaper Clipping - Also on my bulletin board is a clipped obituary of the inventor of the Western shirt. I have no idea why.

Okay, so what have you got? What makes your space yours and shows just how much you are screwed up and how much like everyone else you are - or aren't?


Suze said...

A composer friend of mine one gave me a photo cube covered with pictures of George W. Bush and corresponding chimpanzees with the exact same facial expressions. I'm looking at it right now. The weirdest thing about this photo cube is that it used to hold the diaper pail shut. I always thought it appropriate that dubya was most useful in my house holding down the lid of the crap pail.

Another funny thing on the computer desk (which is mostly full of non-filed bills and random scraps of paper) is a small bowl full of bean seeds I collected from last summer's garden. The beans got overripe, so I saved the seeds and I have no idea if they will grow, but I'm going to try.

Mrs. Allroro said...

I don't have a desk right now, but in college I had one, and I had a collection of plastic glasses. I had drinking straw glasses, coke bottle glasses from goodwill (we're talking eye glasses here, if that isn't clear yet)....I don't really remember any more now, but I know I had about six pairs of unusual frames.

And business cards covered my desktop. They were not for business contacts (probably obvious to you) but were cards I had accumulated over the years. I have no idea where I got so many business cards, and the only one i remember was for a motorcyclist from the CMA who I had met at Cumberland Falls. Weird. I think as soon as I get a job with a desk I will start another unusual desk collection. First priority.

Mrs. Allroro said...

80% of your collection could be considered a little morbid, by the way. :-)

Jessi said...

Suze - Still giggling.

Mrs. A - Really? I would have said 60%. I guess the other 20% is the bat signal? I don't know. I don't find that to be morbid. He is the dark knight, though. Anyway, I figure 60% morbid is pretty much who I am. 40% too cheerful for words and 60% morbid.

Jenn-Jenn, the Mother Hen said...

My desk is covered in lovey-dovey messages Jamie has drawn/written/decorated for me over the last 5.25 years (!) in my current job. I also have a cherub figurine that was my mom's, a pewter mouse (get it? 'puter mouse?) that was my sister's, and desk supplies that are obsessively labeled "FRONT DESK! PUT ME BACK!" because everyone walks off with my scissors/stapler/tape dispenser. I don't have anything cool, or morbid, or strange. Although the desk top on my computer screen alertnates between the TARDIS, Johnny Depp as Sweeney Todd, and Jack Skellington from "Nightmare Before Christmas". Guess I'm a little morbid after all! :-)

Strangeite said...

My cubicle was depressingly unadorned except for 3 items.

I had printed a color copy of the most awesome painting in the universe.

A copy of this comic that encapsulates my life very well.

And last, but certainly not least, a crossbow that I built entirely out of office supplies. It fired ball point pens as the bolt and was surprisingly dangerous. The first time I fired it, I aimed it at a metal filing cabinet about 15 feet away. I put a dent in the cabinet about 1/2 to 3/4 inch deep and at least 8 inches wide. The impact resulted in a deafening bang that co-workers heard 2 floors below me.

I was very proud.

Strangeite said...

p.s. If anyone attempts to build such a weapon, remove the ink cartridge before you load the crossbow.