Friday, June 4, 2010

5 Things on Friday - Ruination Edition

Five Things on Friday will be a weekly list of five things. Subject to be determined by me, but feel free to make suggestions in the comments. I will list my five things and then open the comments up to you, my loyal followers, readers, fans, groupies, what have you. Please respond. Or else, I'll feel all alone in the Earth. It'll be bad. Really.

I am a simple girl. Really, I am. I used to have a friend who classed her friends in laundry terms. "Dry Clean Only" meant high end, high maintenance. "Machine wash cold, lay flat to dry," was your average woman, handle with care and she'll put up with you forever. I, in her terms, am "Machine wash warm, tumble dry, cool iron if needed." I require very little special attention.

There are many ways for me to have a perfect night. I love the theatre, but I am perfectly fine with dinner and a movie. I can gallery hop all night, but I can also sit at home and watch TV. I like laying in the grass and watching the stars, or laying in bed and watching Starz. You get the point. I'm not hard to please.

But there are a few small things that will ALWAYS ruin my night. Here they are:


1. The Foundation for a Better Life - Their commercials always make me cry. There's this one, with a kid whose mom is trying to help him find his sport and it turns out that he can sing and he sings her a thank you song. Appreciation, pass it on. Or the one with the prom queen with Down's. I bawl like a baby and then I spend the rest of the night wondering why real life isn't like those commercials.

2. High School Musical - I can quite happily watch most of the TV shows that Brynna likes. I will watch Wizards of Waverly Place, Good Luck Charlie, Zeke and Luther. Really, I can tolerate most anything. Except HSM. I don't know what it is, exactly. The overly catchy songs? The happy-schmappy not at all true portrayal of life in high school? The clothes? Sharpay? Or maybe it's just that I know musicals and this... this... has music... Sort of.

3. Ruby Tuesdays - I bring this up because I'll probably be dining there tomorrow evening. And I am dreading it. Don't get me wrong, their food is fine. Just like every other major chain restaurant in the world. It doesn't suck. Some of it is quite tasty. I'll never get over them ditching the Strawberry Tallcake from their menu, but since I craved their Pomegranate Lemonade my entire last pregnancy, it's a wash. It's the seating that bothers me. When you go to Ruby Tuesday, at least the one in my town, they seat you according to whether or not you have kids. Oh, no, they don't tell you this. They just do it. They seat all the people with kids in the big central area and everyone else in the areas around the perimeter. A couple of points about this:
  • It's icky. If you're going to do something like that, be straightforward.
  • The wait. I have had to wait for upwards of a hour while there were perfectly good tables open. They make up excuses for this, but then they seat me next to everyone else with kids and I know the truth.
  • Backwards. If you are going to do this, seat the kids around the edges where parents have some control. Instead, you end up navigating a maze of tables and chairs, getting to and leaving the table (and going to the bathroom, twice per kid in my experience). Not to mention the noise. It seems like the biggest complaint I ever had about kids in restaurants before I had kids in restaurants (Note: I have no complaints now. If you are managing to not kill your kids with your butter knife, you're doing fine, sweetie, just fine.) was the noise. So, why, for the love of all that's good and holy, would you put the kids in the center area where everything echoes? Why?
4. Comedies - The Husband and I can never agree on a movie. Never. He likes comedies. The slapstickier, ridiculous, potty-humor-filled, the better. He is a fan of Dumb and Dumber. Need I say more? I prefer something a little more... I don't know. I actually am a fan of pretty much everything else. I like horror, action, suspense, drama, arthouse, foreign, animated, historical, fantasy. Pretty much anything, except his version of comedy. And it's not that I'm opposed to comedy. Monty Python, anyone? Now that is funny stuff. Just not his stuff. So, when a big comedy like that is in theaters, we argue and then we settle. For something blockbustery that I don't mind seeing. There's always something I'd rather watch. I still haven't seen The Reader. Heck, I still haven't seen Little Miss Sunshine. No, I'm not bitter.

5. Bad shoes - I love shoes. I'm a little bit of a shoe freak, but I have these feet, these size 10 and a half wide feet that have no arch whatsoever and I get really pretty shoes and then fifteen minutes later I'm howling in pain. I can't tell you how many dates The Husband and I have had to make a Target or Wal-Mart pit stop halfway through to buy me some flip flops. Because I can't handle the pain anymore. And then I feel guilty. Which, also, always ruins my night.

So, your turn! What will invariably ruin your night? Are you doing anything fun this weekend? Will your night be ruined by a paranoid babysitter? A wardrobe malfunction? Weak drinks? Share it all. I'll be editing the post to include links to those who choose to post on their own sites, so let me know in the comments or in email with the little contact me button up there.

Mrs. A at Glory Be's Version

7 comments:

Orlandel said...

OK, since I'm you're babysitter tonight, I promise not to be paranoid....well, I'll try not to call.

I can also keep the girls so you don't end up in the baby section at Tuesdays ;->

Jenn-Jenn, the Mother Hen said...

I'm right there with you on the comedy thing. I despise what I call "stupid comedies". If the running joke is about how stupid everybody is, I'm not going to watch it. This is why I avoid Adam Sandler comedies like the plague. Never saw Dumb and Dumber or its prequel. Never watched Beavis and Butthead... Get the idea? Now, you want me to que up "The Full Monty", any Monty Python movie, "Date Night" or any other intelligent comedy? Oh yeah, right there with ya!

I have your feet. Sometimes I can go down to a 9 wide, sometimes up to an 11, just depends on who makes the shoe. And I love me some tall heels. The taller the better. I have several pairs that are 4". I have a thing about sexy heels.... as long as I don't have to wear them for more than a couple of hours. If I wear them to work, they get kicked off under my desk and only put back on when I have to tinkle or get a drink from the kitchen.

As for the restaurant, I'd tell the hostess if you can't be seated around the edge, then you'll leave. Then follow up on it. Start a campaign among your friends and family to do the same thing. Call the manager and complain about this practice. If they don't stop, call corporate and complain. Take action and they will stop doing it (eventually).

Becca said...

We once went to a restaurant with Christopher when he was around 3. A couple was seated near us. Christopher was behaving quite well, but they took one look at him, flagged down the waiter and asked to be seated "someplace more private". I recognized the code. I was kind of offended--he was happily coloring at the time, and I'm happy to say to make a peep the whole dinner.

I'm also in the habit of putting off trips to the store or other places if he isn't in the mood for it. He knows if he acts up, we go home. I don't do it for other people; I look at it from a respect standpoint. We all get grumpy and I don't like to be dragged through a store if I'm not in the mood for it.

I have given up on women's shoes. I have freakin' pontoons for feet, so I've taken to shopping in the men's department. Luckily, I'm not a fan of heels or open toes, so it works for me.

I think for comedies, I have standards that are too high. I detest Farelly brothers and Austin Powers. I finally saw SuperBad, The Hangover, Tropic Thunder, and Pineapple Express and they were OK. Tropic Thunder kind of sucked, actually, since I could not buy the premise. I wait for this stuff to come on cable because I refuse to pay money at the theatre for crap. Lately, the funniest thing I've seen is Soap--all seasons available for instant streaming on Netflix.

Mrs. Allroro said...

I'll try to think of five things.

I have pretty much given up on shoes. I've never been much for dress up shoes, but I still love adorable tennis shoes and flats, especially Chuck Taylors and mary janes. The last time I wore anything resembling a heel, I was in pain after a few minutes and I pretty sure it showed all over my face. I saw people I hadn't seen in a while and when they asked how things were going and I said great, wonderful, they asked again. Then I told them about the shoes. I can't even wear Crocks, if that tells you how weird my feet are. (Not that I'm overly interested in wearing crocks, I just hear they never stink, and I'm into that.)

I had a friend in college who loved Tommy Boy and she convinced the rest of us to think we loved it, too. We watched in every night for a long time. But I think I was spared by my sleeping-in-any-and-every-movie habit. I watched it once a few months after I finished college and thought "I don't remember this part." Then came the opening credits. Yep, I'm that bad. So I can basically handle any movie out there!! (But in defense of Tommy Boy, I do love the stupid people movies where the stupid person is an overly innocent character, like Tommy Boy or Elf).

Mrs. Allroro said...

I did my five things and it may have ruined my evening to think about all that. :-)

Jessi said...

Jenn - We really only go for my sister-in-law's birthday every year, so I don't have much pull. I did drink four pomegranate lemonades, though.

Becca - I actually accused Tropic Thunder of being the worst movie ever made. I found it terribly un-funny. I have high standards, too.

Mrs. A - I love flats, especially cute little ballet flats or skimmers. And I'm down to one pair of Chucks, but I still love em. I still wear my Doc's too, but every once in a while, nothing beats a pair of heels.

Tessa said...

Okay, may I just say again, that...I LOVE YOUR BLOG. You are sooooo funny. Anyway, I'm with you on just about all of it, though I have never had a problem getting a booth at Ruby's, but then again we don't go anywhere that we will have to wait...not for the children's sake but for my sanity. I can only sit there so long and entertain them and there ain't a steak in town that is worth corralling my kids for an hour. Ya know what I'm sayin'?

Also, the shoes thing...Totally!!! I love shoes too, but God did not make my feet to wear stilletos or any other torture device. I can only wear them for short periods. But I'm not complaining. My feet work and get me where I'm going. Some people can't say that.

HSM-Not my favorite movie to watch with the kids and, girl, I know whatcha sayin' 'bout Sharpay, but I enjoy most of the songs and Zac Efron is pretty easy on the eyes.

Movies- Oy vey, I could go on 4-eva!! I am not necessarily a movie buff, but I know what I like. They are kind of like books for me. Some of them take you places that you want to visit again and again. For instance, we just watched The New World with Colin Farrell. Ever see it? It is a take on the whole Pocahontas and John Smith saga. Mike thought it was a bore, but I really liked it. The romance between the two was intense yet innocent all at the same time kind of like Twilight. But the scenery, supposedly Virginia I think, was BEAUTIFUL. If you don't watch it for the story, watch it for the cinematography (?). But as far as comedies go, I'm with you. Do not ask me to sit down and watch a Will Ferrell movie and I need to hear some reviews before I watch Jim Carrey either. The Majestic was wonderful. He is a fine actor. So why waste time on the idiotic Ace Ventura movies? The man is actually talented. I did like Liar, Liar, though.
Best comedy of all time, for me...The Hangover. Seriously, you have to watch it. I will warn you now that it will offend you if you have any morals or ethics, but once you get numb to the "f" word and inappropriateness of the whole thing, it is roll around in the floor, try to catch your breath, tears rolling down your face funny. Enjoy. Also, you need to stop everything you are doing and run out and watch Little Miss Sunshine. GREAT movie!!! You will laugh, cry, be shocked and inspired all at the same time. It is wonderful.

I love your 5 Things editions. Keep it up!!