Monday, May 17, 2010

Conversations with a Five Year Old - Puberty (?), Listening, and Loving Edition

Okay, this week, we are doing crochet post on Tuesday, as opposed to last week, when we said we'd do a crochet post on Wednesday or Thursday and then only posted twice in the whole week and never with crochet. It's okay, I promise. We'll all survive. Although, looking at my stat counter this week, it appears that you people want content and don't just wander over to read my archives on the off days, so FINE!

So, on with the conversations:

Brynna: Daddy, how old are you?
The Husband: 31.
Brynna: Okay, well, you're going to be 88 soon.
TH: I am?
Brynna: Yes, and when you turn 88, your body is going to go through some changes.
NiNi: What kind of changes Brynna?
Brynna: Well, first you'll change into a map...
TH: So, when I'm 88, I'll be a map?
Brynna: No, you'll be done, then. You'll be a human again.
NiNi: Do you know how old Granddaddy is, Brynna?
Brynna: How old?
NiNi: Quickly calculating math. He is 84 years old.
Brynna: Brightly. Good, then he'll really be 88 soon.

*I have no idea what to say about this, except that we have been watching a lot of the tween shows on Disney lately. I am especially fond of I'm in the Band. Is it okay, that I'm in love with the lead singer and his weird lipstick? No, well, then, I'm not. Anyway, there was an episode of Kid vs. Kat which is my least favorite, but I find it, well, inoffensive, so I keep my mouth shut. So, they thought that Kid was turning into a werecat, except his dad mistook it for puberty and started trying to give him the talk. But it turned out that Kat had glued cat hair all over his body. See what I mean? That's just not funny. Or whatever. I just don't get it, but it's not like it's bad enough to ban it.

The following entirely in whispers.
Brynna: Shoves me down in church, sees my face. I'm sorry.
Me: Brynna Kathryn! Inappropriate.
Brynna: I'm sorry.
Me: You need to
Brynna: I'm sorry.
Me: find a seat
Brynna: I'm sorry
Me: and put your bottom
Brynna: I'm sorry
Me: in it.
Brynna: I'm sorry
Me: Did you hear me?
Brynna: I'm sorry
Me: I accept your apology. Did you hear what I asked you to do?
Brynna: I'm sorry, I said.
Me: Quit apologizing.
Brynna: I'm sorry.
Me: And find a seat and put your
Brynna: I'm sorry.
Me: in it, right now!
Brynna: Fine. Picks up her backpack full of books and marches out of the sanctuary. Where she finds a seat in the front hall and puts her bottom in. I can't even argue with this.

Brynna: I love you, daddy.
The Husband: I love you too, sweetie.
Brynna: Mommy, read this to me.
Me: Really? Really?
Brynna: Mommy, will you please read this to me?
Me: I appreciate the polite way you asked the second time, but why does Daddy get a "I Love you," and I only get a "Read to me?"
Brynna: I love you, too, you know.
Me: Yeah, I know. I love you, too.
Brynna: 'Cause you're in my family and I love everybody in my family. Except, some people, I'm kind of shy of in my family, but I still love them.
Me: That's really nice Brynna. It's not easy to love people when you are shy of them.
Brynna: And then, there's Maren. It's not easy to love her either. But I do.
Me: That's nice.
Brynna: Most of the time.

* Frankly, when I'm not stressing that they'll grow up hating each other and never speak a civil word and talk bad about each other at family holidays, I find their sibling rivalry kind of amusing.


Jenn-Jenn, the Mother Hen said...

Derek Jupiter is played by Steve Valentine, whom I have lusted after and obsessed over since his days on Crossing Jordan. I lurve Steve Valentine and have very inappropriate dreams about him saying some "velly interestink" things to me while we do unmentionable deeds..... BUT, I cannot bring myself to watch him on that show. I mean, yay for him having a recurring role and the means by which to pay his bills, but, it just doesn't do it for me. When Jamie watches that show, I head for the other room. However, one part of me cannot resist swooning slightly every time he opens that luscious mouth.

Okay, I'll stop making you all mightily uncomfortable now. Whee!

Steve said...

Really laughing out loud at that last one. Beautiful.